Let’s talk about something that's close to my heart: listening to yourself. It's not as simple as it sounds, and it's something we often forget to do in the hustle and bustle of life. We're so busy trying to make sure everyone close to us is looked after, and then we ‘people please’ everyone else. We have to fit in, so we follow the rules and then of course we forget to check in with ourselves.
Think of it like this: Imagine your life is a road. You're driving along, and you hit a roadblock. You can't just keep going. You have to stop, assess the situation, and figure out how to get around it. That's where “The Melways“ come in. It's like a clear map, helping you understand how you got to that roadblock in the first place, so you can find a new path forward.
Here's the thing: We all have an inner voice, a truth that whispers to us, but we often ignore it. We're so used to listening to “outside in” voices – our parents, our friends, our bosses – that we forget about listening to our “inside in” voices - ourselves. But that “inside in” voice is the key to unlocking self-love and living a life that feels authentically YOURS.
Let me show you how that goes...
"Let's think about Sarah, a mum of two, feeling completely overwhelmed and disconnected from herself. She was always doing for others - her kids, her partner, her job - but feels like she's lost touch with who she really is. Let alone any ideas of what she really wants or needs.
I'd start with simply encouraging Sarah to pay attention to her body. I'd ask her to notice how she felt physically when she was rushing around looking after everyone. She'd realise her shoulders were always up around her ears and her breathing was shallow. This was her body trying to tell her something, but she'd been ignoring these signals for years.
Next, we'd help Sarah check in with herself more regularly. We’d encourage her to start with listening. She’d start by taking a few moments each day to ask herself, “How am I feeling right now? What do I need?” At first, she'd struggle to answer these questions. Why? Because she's so used to thinking about everyone else's needs, that she's forgotten how to tune into her own.
As we continue together,
Sarah would begin to feel more empowered. She'd realise she needed some time for herself. Even if it was just 15 minutes a day to read, take a walk, or sit and have a cup of tea without having to make anyone else anything. She'd feel guilty at first. But as we unpacked it together, and she’s practiced being there for herself, she’d noticed she had more peace and energy for her herself and for her family. She’d feel cared for and more connected to 'herself' again. Or maybe even for the first time ever.
The real breakthrough would come when Sarah tells me, 'I realised I've been on autopilot for years. Now, I’m listening! I feel like I'm actually living my life, not just going through the motions of day-to-day.'
Yay for listening!
This is what my work is all about! Helping you tune into your own story, listen to the truth of how you are and what you really need, and empower yourself to make changes. It's not about dramatic life overhauls, but small, powerful shifts that help you reconnect with your authentic self.
So, take a moment to check in- what might your body be trying to tell you right now? What would change if you started really listening to yourself?"
Curious to see what feeling connected to yourself is like?
Want to start to listen to yourself? I know you said yes!!
So let’s try these 3 things.
1. Recognize Your Patterns:
We all have patterns, habits, and ways of thinking that we've developed over time. Some of these patterns might be helpful, but others might be holding us back. Take a moment to reflect on your patterns. Do you always put others' needs before your own? Or seek “outside in” validation to feel good about yourself? Do you ignore your own needs? Once you recognize these patterns, you can start to change them.
2. Reframe Your Perspective:
Reframing your perspective means shifting from blaming to understanding. Ask yourself: "Why am I doing this? What am I trying to achieve? What are my motivations?" By understanding the "why" behind your actions, you can start to make different choices. When we're stuck in a rut, it's easy to blame others or circumstances. But the truth is, we always have choices. We can choose to stay stuck, or we can choose to change something.
3. Build greater Self-Awareness:
Self-awareness is the key to understanding yourself. It's all learning about listening to your “inside in” voice, recognising your patterns and your emotions, and understanding your motivations – your why’s. It's about being honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses. When you're self-aware, you can make choices that match with your values and what you want.
This is why The Melways is so important to me and why I know it will make a difference to you.
The Melways is about giving you the freedom to support yourself and your needs, in ways you never thought possible. It's about making choices for yourself. Not waiting for someone else to fix things. It's about realizing that you are worthy of love and happiness, and that you have the power to create the life you want.
Ready to start listening to yourself?
Take a deep breath, and ask yourself: "What do I need right now? What would make me feel good? What would be supportive for me right now?" Then, take a tiny step towards that. It's not about making drastic changes overnight. It's about taking small steps, one day at a time.
You are worthy of love and happiness.
You are capable of creating the life you want.
Come hang out with me and navigate your way to Self-Love by listening to yourself.